You can keep him
by AEKT
Summary: Romance, envy, danger, ok not really, but its funny! With Ewan McGregor co-starring! R/R
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own the Labyrinth, I don't own Ewan McGregor, though I really would love to

Disclaimer: I don't own the Labyrinth, I don't own Ewan McGregor, though I really would love to! J.. really… would love to.. but I own me(Katie), (I am the main character) and I own Trevor. You can't use me at all cuz I would feel violated..but if you want to use Trevor, I don't know why you would want to, you can just ask. Oh ya.. I don't own starz or Black hawk down.. just in case !

"What a jerk!" I mumbled to myself, as I shut-down my computer, recalling the conversation I had with Trevor, my 'friend', on AOL minutes earlier.

"Your not popular, so why act like it, most people thing you're a cold bitch, a lot of people hate you," Trevor had typed, out of the blue. Iwas shocked.

"Um… ok…"I just typed in response. "Like you have any place to talk." I said to myself, not bothering to dignify him with anything he could turn around and say back to me

"A bit bitter aren't we?" I asked, smiling. 

"Just a little." He responded, making me laugh.

"You don't even know what that means do you?" I questioned, still laughing.

"uh…. I don't want to talk to you anymore.. bye," He quickly logged off.

"He was just trying to impress on of his friends by insulting someone younger then him," I concluded, "I can't believe I ever liked him, he looks like Hoggle! I hope he breaks his leg 8 million more times." Realizing that it was sort of late, I glanced at the clock, 12:31 PM. 

I didn't really want to go to bed yet, so I turned on my TV, and flipped the channels. And much to my surprise, Labyrinth was on Starz! What a coincidence, I mean, to the reference I made about Hoggle a moment earlier. So I decided to watch it. It was at the part where Sarah was wishing away Toby.

"If only I could really wish away Trevor, just anywhere," I laughed, "I really wish the goblins would take Trevor away, right now."

"Oh, I can't believe you just said that," I said to myself, "Your losing it. Oh, and now your having regular conversations with yourself too? Time for bed I think." I switched off the lights and my TV and tried to sleep.

I kept my eyes close but I couldn't help but keep thinking about Trevor's words. Suddenly, a breeze ruffled my hair, surprising me. I didn't think I left my window open. 

I opened one eye…. And saw a tree.

"A tree? K.. that's… not… really right." I sat up and looked around.

"K that's nuff' lasanga before bed, Katie."

"I agree, that stuff can kill ya." A voice said from behind me. I slowly turned around. And who was sitting on a fallen log on a few feet away from my bed, which was in the middle of nowhere? Take a guess. I shuddered.

"I have messed up dreams, its just wrong that your dreaming about David Bowie," I said, once again, to myself. 

"I assure you, this is no dream, Katie, and I always thought David Bowie was quite a handsome man," Jareth said, yes it was Jareth if you haven't figured it out yet.

"Ewww, gay Jareth dream," I scolded myself. Apparently, he choose to ignore that last comment.

"Ok, lets get the "Jareth your so dreamy' part over with and skip to the chase," Jareth stood and walked over to my bed.

"You.. dreamy? HAHAHA.. that's great," I laughed, untangling myself from my sheets and tumbling out of my bed.

"You.. don't think I am drop-dead gorgeous?" He asked shocked.

"Drop-dead scary if anything, you wear more make-up then my Aunt Hilda," I said, yawning.

"Really? You don't think I'm sexy, not even like this?" He put his left hand on his hip, formed a crystel, and gave his face a mysterious look.

"AHH, stop, I value my eyesight," I said, covering my eyes.

"Well, this is a new development, I've never been told that I was…"

"Ugly? Scary? Monsterous?" I suggested.

"Yes, thank you," He snapped, "Well, Im a little hurt, but since you were so… brutally honest, I'll give you one wish, and since it's probably to get Trevor back.."

"Trevor?!!? That's why I'm here? Oh.. no no no.. you can keep him, send me back home."

"What? This is odd, this has never happened either," Jareth said, scratching his chin, trying to look thoughtful.

"Don't do that, this is turning into a nightmare…" I grinned.

"Ok, nevermind about the wish," Jareth said.

"Wait! Sorry!" I pleaded!

"Ok then, this has never happened before, but I am afraid I can't send you back without you at least making an attempt to solve the Labyrinth.. you have to be in there for 13 hours." Jareth explained.

"That's messed up, well, I don't want Trevor,I will go stand in a corner of the damn Labyrinth for 13 hours if I have too." I responded, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Why?" Jareth asked, it looked like he was reconsidering ever taking Trevor.

"Long story, but for my wish.. I want Ewan McGregor to come here and do this with me!" I grinned happily. Jareth arched and eyebrow..

"Umm… alright…." Jareth formed a crystel and through it at the ground next to me. I frowned.

"That was really gay," I thought, watching a glitter swirl around the spot the crystal hit. Then, surprisingly, Ewan actually appeared. Looking mighty gorgeous might I add, wearing boxers and a white tee and tube socks, his hair buzzed short for his new movie Black Hawk Down. 

"What the fook?" He said in his adorable Scottish burr. My mouth dropped to the ground. He turned to me and then to Jareth. His eyes widened.

"Who the hell are you? Some David Bowie transvestite?" he asked angrily, I giggled.

"You were wished…" Jareth started, adding a rude tone to his voice. Icut him off..

"I don't know why you here, I think some freak accident, but this guy over here can't send you back until you spend thirteen hours in that thing?"I said, pointing to the Labyrinth in the distance. I didn't really want Ewan to know that I wished him there, that would probably upset him.. it would upset me.

"Who are you?" Ewan asked me, calming down a little at the sight of another human, though a young girl at that.

"I'm Katie, though I know this isn't a good time, but I'm a huge fan," I said, smiling.

"Anyways, the girl is right, you must solve my Labyrinth in thirteen hours, or Trevor, a friend," I coughed loadly, "of Katie's will be prisoner here."

"What the fook is wrong with you? Are you some physco kidnapper?" Ewan asked once again, angrily. 

"I'm sure Katie can explain everything to you," Jareth said, starting to fade, "I um.. gotta go.. do.. stuff." Ewan turned to me questioningly.

"Hey, don't look at me, that's my bed over there, how do you think I got here?" I shrugged, then turned towards the Labyrinth. "I guess we better go."

"This has got to be a dream," I heard Ewan mumble from behind me, I can't believe I am actually with Ewan McGregor.. this is so a dream..

Review, please, I guess I just wanna see what you think, though, I just had to write this, cuz.. its really hard to explain..

And if you liked it, then don't worry I will update… tomorrow probably!


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: well if you read the first chapter disclaimer, then ya

Disclaimer: well if you read the first chapter disclaimer, then ya.. same thing.. but if you didn't read the first chapter, then what are you doing here in the second chapter?! I don't own Christina Augilara.. so….

Thanks for the reviews everyone!! I appreciate it!

Based on actual events-like the first chapter.. not the whole Jareth/Labyrinth part though.. I actually had lasanga!

"So, you never did say your name…" Trevor said in a trying-to-be-seductive voice. Jareth's eyes widened.

"Umm.. Jareth," He said turning to sit on his throne… Trevor was standing in the middle of the room, a few goblins surrounding him. He had been acting very odd since Jareth entered, and he didn't know if it was his normal behavior or what.

"Jareth, that's kind of a masculine name for a female," Trevor said thoughtfully, "But I kind of like it." Jareth's eyes widened even more, at least, as humanly possible… but Jareth really isn't a human huh?

"Wait, I'm not a fe…" he started, but Trevor cut him off, moving closer.

"Are you single? Cuz I am." Trevor took some mouth spray from his pocket and sprayed it in his mouth.

"Oh… my… god…" Jareth looked horrified, as Trevor moved closer, Jareth waved his hand, sending Trevor to the Bog.

"So, where exactly are we going?" Ewan asked following me through the large intrance gate.

"Well, we need to get to the castle in 13 hours or this Trevor kid gets turned into a goblin," I said simply, turning left.

"I see…"

"But we aren't going to the castle," I said stopping and leaning against the wall.

"And why is that?" Ewan asked looking around. I smiled.

"He is so cute, and tall too… to bad he is married and older then me." I thought.

"Because I think Trevor would do well as a goblin, though it isn't much of a change from what he is like now," I laughed, "He kind of has the personality of a goblin… as well as the looks."

"I see,"Ewan said slowly, "Why do we need to rescue him?"

"Well, I wished him here, and apparently you get a chance to save the person you wish here," I explained.

"That's a bit irregular, why did you wish him here?"

"Because I don't like him, he is a jerk and does not deserve to live with regular people," I said stubbornly.

"Oh, well if we wished away everyone we didn't like then the world would be a better place then huh?" Ewan laughed.

"I guess," I shrugged, "You seem pretty calm for a situation like this… I mean being taken from your home to some strange world where you can't leave."

"Well, I'm pretty sure this is some dream," Ewan replied, "So I decided to just let it run its course."

"Oh," I stated, "Well, I don't really feel like standing here for 12 more hours, so we might as well take a look around." I turned and started down the path, Ewan close in tow. This was getting very awkward.

Jareth had been reading a book called "How to make yourself appear handsome when your really not." By I. M. Ugly for the past hours, glad not to be bothered by Trevor. Suddenly, an awful stench started to fill the throne room, causing most of the goblins to clear out. 

"Uh oh," Jareth mumbled, slowly closing the book.

"I'm back, and boy did I have a refreshing swim!" A voice called from outside the throne room door. Trevor popped his head in.

"Oh no, oh no," Jareth cried to himself. Trevor walked over to him, seeing that Jareth looked sad, he put his arm around him.

"Whats wrong cutie?" He asked. Jareth quickly pulled away.

"Theres something you should know about me," He said, terrified.

"Whats that? I don't mind that you live with green mice," Trevor smiled.

"Im a male," Jareth stated plainly, "and Im not gay." Trevor looked unfazed.

"Oh, I am not gay, but you look kind of like Christina Augilara, and I just assumed that you were a girl," he said, "But.. you look really good in that eye shadow… I wonder how I would look… I know! Lets have makeovers!!" Trevor giggled and clapped his hands together.

Jareth slapped his hand to his forehead, raised his eyes to the ceiling and mumbled, "That's it… I am retiring."

"You never really did say why you wished him here," Ewan said suddenly after we walked for awhile, funny how you never know what to talk about with a celebrity, especially while you are both in pyjamas.

" I ummm… well…" I stammered.

"Oh ello!" A voice that sounded like an elf called. Ewan and I looked around, no one was near us.

"Oh no," I said, realizing who it was.

"What?" Ewan asked. I looked at the wall, scanning the bricks. Finally, I found the source of the voice.

"Hi, little blue worm," I said, bending down to his level. Ewan stared at me strangly.

"Ello," he said once again, looking at Ewan, who bent down to my level.

"Did he just say "hello"?" Ewan whispered to me.

"No, he said 'ello' but that's close enough," I replied smiling. The worm nodded.

"Oh… ok," Ewan responded, eyeing the little fellow.

"Come inside, have a cup o' tea and meet the mrs'," The worm said, nodding his head towards the entrance which was about 2 inches wide and 2 inches tall.

"What the hell is this thing talking about? Cup o' tea? And he sounds like he just sucked the helium out of a ballon," Ewan asked, his very handsome, deep, blue-green-gray eyes still staring at the worm.

"Relax, we aren't going to the castle, just wasting thirteen hours," I said politely.

"Oh, ok then, well, that way is to the castle," the worm said motioning left, "I don't recommend going that way."

"I'm sure you don't," I said, standing up, "Come on Ewan." Ewan rose, still eyeing that damn worm, seriously, it was like he had never seen a talking worm before.

"What way was he talking about?" Ewan questioned, running his hand over the wall, "All I see thisbloody wall and two ways to go that don't seem to end anywhere."

"Just a sec," I said walked towards the wall.

"Katie, there is a wall there," Ewan warned. I stepped past the wall.

"Hehe, I was right," I laughed, "I guess this is what the worm meant. This entrance thingy."

"Odd, how did you know that was here?" Ewan said stepping next to me.

"Oh I saw the movie," I laughed, which is what I've been doing a lot lately.

"Oh, right," Ewan said, laughing too, "So I guess we are off this way then huh?" He pointed right.

"Guess so. Lead the way."

Alright,, you all might think this isn't as good as my first chapter, I dunno, I tried!


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Oh, same as before

Disclaimer: Oh, same as before! Except I don't own DBZ! Ok? Ok. Nor do I own Miss Cleo, nor do I have any desire too.

"Maybe we could play some golf or something?" Trevor suggested hopefully.

"No." Jareth said rubbing his temples, keeping his eyes on the floor.

"How about Nintendo?" 

"No."

"Then what about…"

"No."

"So I guess no makeovers then?" Jareth looked at him incredulously, shook his head, and looked back down at the floor.

"Jari? Buddy?"

A few hours later~~~~

"I'm assuming that having a bird on your head is normal around here?" Ewan asked, as we stood looking curiously at a sleeping old man with a bird perched on his head.

"Um.. I guess so," I responded, "Though I don't really know what's normal around here. And honestly I am starting to get a little frightened."

"Actually, this place is sort of interesting," Ewan chuckled, poking the old man, who stirred slightly, "I mean, I never really saw a talking worm before." 

"You can't be serious…" I smiled slightly, sigh, if only he was younger.

"Oh, I was just trying to lighten the mood a little," Ewan winked, "Say, I never really learned anything about you, though, and I have been here what 3-4 hours?" We turned and started walking down the stone path into a hedge maze.

"Well, I'm just a regular girl, not some famous actress," I stated, folding my arms.

"Oh, well, I didn't mean that," Ewan said, his accent strong as ever, "I meant, I know your name is Katie and you're a fan of me and not Trevor. But I am sure there is more to it then just that."

"Well, my name is Katie Monroe and I live in Colorado, and Trevor… well… it is one of those love turn to hate things." I explained, "But I know all about you. You were born in Creiff, Scotland, you dropped out of high school to pursue acting, and that your married, have one daughter and is expecting another, and I always wanted to meet you!" Ewan laughed.

"I see your keeping up, you know me about as well as I do," he smiled, "That's kind of scary."

"I would be frightened too, I mean there a millions of people out there who know everything about you right down to your pants… err.. boxer size," I said, laughing, once again.

"Really?" He looked at me questioningly.

"Oh, I'm not one of those people," I responded protectively, "I….. swear…..."

"Oh, ok, that's a bit more comforting," Ewan said. We turned left, right, left, left, left… well.. you get the idea. We basically walked in silence.

Silence.

More silence.

A wee bit more silence, as Ewan would put it.

"Those are some interesting door knockers there," Ewan said suddenly, we ended up in front of two interesting doors.

"Oh, I love these guys!" I cried, jumping up and down.

"It's… like looking into a mirror…" Hoggle said, inspecting Trevor.

"It is… and might I add you are quite a handsome fellow," Trevor replied, who was bent down to Hoggle's height. Jareth watched the scene in front of him amazed.

"Well, I hate to break up this little… moment," Jareth said, "But Hoggle, you shouldn't be fraternizing with my…" Jareth shuddered, "prisoner."

"Really? Your prisoner? COOL! So.. It's like slumber party right? 'Cause we can have popcorn and stay up late telling scary stories!" Trevor said excitedly.

"Um… how old are you again?" Jareth asked, seriously.

"16, why?"

"uh… no reason."

"So do you think we could watch Dragon Ball Z tonight? It's the season finale!"

"Um….. sure… why not."

"Yes!" Trevor jumped up and down for a few moments, Jareth instantly regretted what he said, suddenly, Trevor stopped, "What's bitter mean?" he asked.

"Well, I can understand that you are depressed," I said to the door knocker with the ring in his mouth, which I had taken out, "I mean, you've been here all your life and it gets boring seeing the same old thing huh? So I say abandon your duties for one day and be wild."

"Well… that's kind of hard, since I'm attached to a door," The knocker replied sadly.

"I see, that can present a problem now can it?" I asked, pondering what I should do to help this guy. I did feel kind of bad for him. The other one was kind of annoying.

"Huh? Can't hear ya! I got a ring in my ears." The other knocker said, practically yelling. I looked over it and arched a brow. Then I turned back to the first knocker.

"Maybe if I could find a chain saw…"

"Umm.. no.. we better go, Katie," Ewan said, taking my arm.

"Oh… well… sorry little guy," I said, shoving the ring back into his mouth… he muttered something inaudible.

"Do you… have discussions with door knockers everyday?" Ewan asked, half-joking. His hand still resting on my arm.

"Of course not, sometimes it's lawn mowers, and sinks… only occasionally because they get kind of argumentative," I replied, smirking. I was kidding, by the way. Ewan grinned (that's right, his adorable grin). 

10 hours have past~ 

"Katie was the first person who ever showed interest in me, I mean, my mommy always said I was a handsome boy, but that only can mean so much," Trevor sniffed, hugging the pillow he held. Jareth sat across from him, crossed legged, holding pillow like Trevor. Both were sitting on the floor.

"I know what you mean! But my mommy never said anything like that to me, heck I don't even have a mommy, I don't know how I got here!" Jareth agreed, wiping a tear from his eye.

"Sometimes, I feel like that too, it helps me when I call Miss Cleo, cause she lies to me about my future and gives me a little hope, we are on a first name basis now!" Trevor suggested, nodding his head with a serious look in his eye.

"You know, at first I thought you were down-right odd, but these hours have been the most enlightening and uplifting of my life!" Jareth beamed.

"Really? Me too! You're my best friend Jari! Though I don't know why I'm here, I am glad I came!" Trevor smiled, hugging Jareth, and surprisingly, Jareth hugged him back,

"Do you think I can borrow your book 'How to attract women by kidnapping their siblings or friends'?" Trevor asked, "I think it could help me."

"Sure, only when I'm finished, I'm still on chapter 2," Jareth answered, "I know, lets roast some marshmallows and pretend we're camping!"

"Sounds like fun!"

"Hey, lets go through that door!" I pointed to a door nearly over grown by leafy vines. Ewan shrugged.

"You're the one who saw the movie." Ewan ruggedly ripped some of the vines away and pulled the door open. I entered slowly, realizing that I was in a small, pitch black tunnel. Ewan entered behind me, and as if on cue we fell through the floor. But before we had a chance to scream, we were caught by hands. That's right, HELPING hands.

"This is kind of… unusual," Ewan said, feeling sort of grossed out.

"Up or down?" one set of hands asked.

"Wait, I saw this part, I know what happens, so up, definitely up," I said positively. One set of hands formed a face that was about to say something but stopped, looking baffled.

"Up? No ones ever chose up before," it finally said, the other faces were whispering to each other.

"Can she choose that?"

"What do we do?"

"What do we say?"

"Um.. how about you take us up?" Ewan suggested.

"Hey, good idea!" One face said.

"Ahem… she chose up?"

"Uh oh… they want to go up!"

"Umm.. enough already, just take us back up,"I ordered.

"Aww, sorry." The hands slowly moved Ewan and I back up to the surface. Ewan pulled him self up onto the floor and grabbed my hand and pulled me up beside him.

"Hmm.. thanks," I said, dusting myself off, "That was an unpleasant experience."

"You can say that again," Ewan agreed, "Let's get out of this tunnel, its sort of creepy." I nodded and Ewan reached for my hand. I took it quickly, grinning, and let Ewan lead me through the darkness to the light at the end. 


	4. chapter 4

Disclaimer: Same as before…

Disclaimer: Same as before…. No Ewie for me!V_V

"Is that the castle?" Ewan asked, both of us staring at the massive building in front of us.

"I think so, but, how did we get here? We didn't even try!" I exclaimed, "and we have like 2 hours left."

"Are we going to turn around then?" Ewan asked,"I mean, I know you don't want to rescue Trevor."

"Oh no, we are going in there, I want to let Jareth know that we solved his Labyrinth with out trying and with hours to spare!" I responded, heading to the front door.

"Well…. Alright," Ewan reluctantly agreed and followed me in. We entered through a huge set of double doors to find our selves in a hallway… directly in front of us were stairs.

"Well, lets go up there," I decided and motioned for Ewan to follow me.

"I see that Jareth isn't really into decorating," Ewan said, looking at a small table with chunks missing, it looked as though it was bitten by some… goblin maybe.

As we headed up the stairs we started to hear voices, one was definitely Trevor's but the other one sounded happy… so it couldn't be Jareth. They were… giggling. We stopped in front of the door that the voices were coming from. I opened it slowly and peeked in.

Trevor and Jareth were sitting on the floor, Trevor was painting Jareth's nails… now I that I read over that sentence.. I realize it is very wrong.

"Oh, this color goes so well with your… mismatched… eyes," Trevor said, holding a color that looked like a pinkish blue. I didn't think there was such a color.

"Really?" Jareth asked, hopeful, "Do you think so?" I pushed the door open wider, Ewan staring in amazement.

"Ahem," I said loudly, Trevor and Jareth's heads whipped around and looked, startled, at Ewan and I.

"Oh, well I hope we aren't interrupting anything," Ewan said slowly, eyeing them both.

"Are you too.. uh…" I started, yes, I meant gay. Trevor and Jareth looked at each other, then at me, and quickly stood up.

"No, no, of course not," They both said quickly.

"Well, I just wanted to let you know that you need to make your Labyrinth a bit more challenging," I said, Jareth arched a brow.

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"I mean, Ewan and I solved it with hours to spare and we weren't even trying," I explained, "We just walked around."

"Really?" He asked, incredulous, Ewan and I nodded slowly.

"I guess this means that we have to take Trevor back then," Ewan said, I moaned, putting a hand to my forehead. Trevor stuck his tongue out at me. He acts like he's 5.

"Well, if you don't want him," Jareth started.

"I don't want him," I said quickly.

"Well, I have grown quite fond of the little fellow and I want him to stay here with me," Jareth finished. Ewan, who hadn't even met Trevor looked shocked.

"Really?!" Trevor, Ewan and I all said simultaneously. Jareth, stepped back, startled.

"Just as company, I swear," He promised.

"Umm… if you want a permanent headache for the rest of your life, then be my guest," I said, still not believing what I'm hearing. Trevor and Jareth giggled and high-fived each other.

I turned to Ewan.

"Well, I had fun today, surprisingly enough that I walked around in pyjamas with my favorite actor in some strange maze," I said, smiling.

"Ya, me too," Ewan agreed.

"Still think this is a dream?" I asked.

"If it is, it's the best one I had in years," He answered. 

"Ok, you aren't ever gonna meet him in real life so you might as well make the most of this dream," Ithought, closing my eyes, I took a deep breath and… reached up and hugged Ewan. Yup, I hugged him.. wow. And surprisingly he hugged me back.

Jareth watched the scene with an eyebrow arched, he turned to Trevor, who shrugged stupidly. Then smiling wickedly, Jareth sent Ewan back to his home, and I back to my home. With out us knowing it.

I opened my eyes, realizing that I was in my front yard, hugging a tree.

"Umm," I started, rubbing my eyes, and looked around, "If that was a dream, how did I get out here?" I turned and headed to my front door, recalling the past events.

"It seemed real enough," I thought, "It had better be real." The thought of never seeing Trevor again was to good to be true. Finding that my door wasn't looked, I headed to my room and went to bed. 

The next morning~

Someone knocking on the front door woke me from my dreamless sleep. I looked at my clock and saw that it was already 12:45.My mother answered the door.

"Does a Katie Monroe live here?" I heard a male ask.

"Yes, I think she is sleeping now, but I will go check," my mother answered, I got out of my bed and walked into the living room.My mom saw me and motioned to the door.

"Someone to see you," She said and went into the kitchen. I walked to the door.

"Hi," Ewan said, "Um… this may sound a bit irregular but I had a dream about you."

"I don't think it was a dream," I responded. 

Ewan smiled and I invited him in.

The end!

Finally, I know, sorry… it kind of sucks huh? Well review anyways! Thanks


End file.
